“Yes…I am in love.”…yeah, I am sure about it…please lock this Mr.Bhagwan… No…not this way…Let me shout a loud to shake the world with the words of love…Let me send the sound waves of my voice to every corner of this universe… Let me speak about the most wonderful and exciting feeling inside me. Love is the most amazing thing happened with me till now…but I really don’t know how to react on it. I mean I behave very strange these days…I feel crazy inside but there is a blushing on my face; I want to speak a lot but when it comes to speak, I stop myself with just a smile. I really don’t know what I am doing but these are just trailer of the sensation that sails my soul boat in the ocean of love these days. My wildest dreams are like put a cap at head, mike in hand and sing loudly like Himesh Reshmiya, curve my hand and dance like Salman Khan on the beats of Dabbang song, Pull off shirt and waves in air like Saurav Ganguly …and lot more like these. But let keep the craziness aside because that is not the main agenda of this article…I start writing this post to portrait the image of my girlfriend with my words…to spread the magic of love that I feel everywhere around me. So here are the details of our relationship in little bouquet of words with innocent smell of love :-
- When it comes to describe a person, we talk about his/her nature and looks. Well …I will tell about looks later…first come to her nature. I can’t describe her nature in one word because every day she looks into different mood to me. Sometime she looks sweet and simple to me, sometime she becomes bold. One day she behaves like a child and next day she talks in mature and sensible way. There are some moments when she was extremely caring and charming to me but there exist few moments too when she was very rough and harsh to me. It seems that every day she starts with fresh mindset and different attire. Well…I can’t say anything exactly about her nature…but one thing for which I am sure is her behavior… Her behavior is totally replica of mine. When I love her, she also start loving me; when I make distance from her, she also maintains some distance from me and when I avoid her, she also start avoiding me. She never makes any complain or excuse to me; she never expect anything from me; and she also not forced me to be with her every time. But to be very true…when I parted from her or avoid her, it gives me pain; feel me sad at the end of the day.
- In the teenage, I thought many things about the topic ‘My kind of girl.’ The girl I dreamed at that time had brown, straight and silky hairs till waist. And yes… she doesn’t use any artificial straightening technique for such hair. But my real girlfriend has dark, black, curly hairs that looks dry and rough sometimes. I love to play her hairs with my fingers, but many times my fingers get stuck in those curls. Sometimes I resolve those curls with love and softness and sometimes I get irritated by this, but she love to watch me playing and struggling with her hairs. I also feel a strange sensation of love and affection continuously through her eyes and smile when I resolve those curls. You can also say that her eyes and smile act as a source of energy and inspiration for me in this game. The most satisfactory point of this whole exercise is the reward that I get in the form of her warm hug at the end. (Also, I know the art of resolving curls)
- During teenage, I also thought that my girlfriend would be the most beautiful in the world. But my real girlfriend is not like that one… I mean she is beautiful and attractive but not always. Sometimes she looks too gorgeous to me and I thought nothing is better than her in the whole universe. But next day…she looks quite average to me. Sometime when I compare my girlfriend with my friend’s girlfriend, I feel jealous with my friend. Even a day also comes when my girlfriend looks too ugly to me such that I don’t want to see her anymore. Once I asked her “Have you apply any kind of make-up at your face; sometime you look very beautiful to me, some day you become quite average and some day you come up with such ugly face. Why are such variations?” She smiled and replied, “Beauty resides in the eyes of viewers. I look same every day; it’s your eyes honey that makes difference. If you look at me with love, innocence and kindness, I always look beautiful to you.”
- “Often love starts with the eyes and reaches deep inside the heart by the way of heartbeats, but our love will be totally different in this context; because it starts feeling deep inside heart first and will be reached in the eyes by the way of consciousness.” I heard this in a dialog of a movie…well reel drama never be real…I never started feeling love in the eyes nor deep inside heart, it just happened due to consequences of series of incidents. And to be very honest, I haven’t done anything with the intentions of falling in love in those incidents. But yes…I attracted toward her first time due to her eyes. When I see into her eyes, it seems that time should stop at that moment and I stuck starring her forever. Her eyes make me move into world of will and love…and I start dreaming while looking into her eyes…and yes…my dreams are fully decorated with our love. However dreams are dreams, they are far apart from reality …even sometimes my girlfriend also not behaves the way I dreamed. But I love to see dreams into her eyes…it really rejuvenate me…and from my side, I always try to live those dreams in reality.
- I am an engineer by profession, a writer from heart and farmer by attitude. But she is like a teacher by profession, player (sport person) by heart and soldier by attitude. As a teacher, she teaches everyone around her with love and punishment both ways; as a player, she works in every situation with same spirit and dedication; and just like a soldier, she maintained brave, ready to fight and man at action like attitude always. One day I told her that I want to become like her…rough and tough…bold and beautiful…but she told me that you could not become like me. You can learn from me and I can learn from you and this way we can work to make our world beautiful but I don’t want you to lose our original charm. After all I love to a person who is not similar to me and I want to enjoy those differences; this is how true love works.
- I love to be shy, silent, simple and cool but she make me shout, hyper and aggressive. May be these are not prime attributes of my personality but sometimes when I come into influence of her; I take bold steps; I shout a loud to shake the world; I become crazy for something. These things amazed me also; how my attitude turns so dramatically in certain situations. But knowingly or unknowingly, she helps me to enhance my caliber, to bring my hidden potential upfront, a different face of my character, and that too maintaining my original cool and calm attitude as it is.
- Her love is true and innocent but she is not like a saint. She loves to play tricks, and her tricks are quite challenging for me. Her tricks irritate me, disturb me, put me in trouble too and sometimes these tricks examine my love and dedication for her. But I must say that God is indeed great to me; he always helps me to make right choice and select correct path on the way of facing her tricks and challenges.
- God may help you always but luck doesn’t favor you every time. Sometimes I make wrong choice while working on her tricks and challenges. Black cloud of selfishness and insanity covers the blue sky of my wisdom and I turn to the wrong way at that time. Knowingly or unknowingly, I hurt my sweet girlfriend at such occasions. Though she doesn’t say anything to me but she cries loudly in alone. And when she cries anywhere in the planet, a storm with poignant sensation strikes at the deep coast of my soul and I start feeling disappoint and lost. I desperately feeling regret of my past actions and in the course of remorse, I say sorry to her. But she is not the one who forgets everything so easily. It takes time to win her faith again; I need to show my commitment and love through my efforts and actions again. This is the only way to bring her smile back and you know… I love to do anything for it.
- One day I told her that I will bring stars at earth for her. She laughed and told “Be passionate like this in love but don’t make such big promises to me, just show your love in small steps and little efforts.” Well I didn’t understand what she said but I haven’t tried such filmi dialogs after that, and also didn’t make any extra-ordinary effort to impress her. I am just doing as per my caliber, capability and faith… and yeah…she is quite happy with it 🙂
- Once I asked her whether she would live with me like this ever. “Well…I am with you in each and every moment but I can’t make any commitment that I will be with you forever; because it’s the universal truth that I will leave you one day.” I started feeling sad after hearing this, thought of being parted from my sweetheart blocked all my sensations and I was not able to think anything at that moment. But she said me “Don’t upset with this fact, just live with me in every moment like that is the last moment of us together, love me like you will never get chance to love me again. If you live like this than believe me …people will know me with your name one day.” I tried to live with her like this after that, and I am really very happy with me on this; but still sometimes thought of being lost her disturbs me.
- Last but not least thing about her…She doesn’t give me anything, not even a single kiss, when I come to her with doubts, dilemma, dishonesty or expectation. But she showered me her true love when I come to her with true heart, innocent love and sheer dedication.
I know you want to know the name of my girlfriend now…well… I don’t want to keep you guessing and play with your patience (and also don’t want you to spread rumorsJ) Let me reveal the secret too…Name of my girlfriend is LIFE (ज़िन्दगी) and yes…I LOVE my LIFE. She is with me in each and every moment of my consciousness and unconsciousness. All I wrote above was about my life. Well…I can’t say I know my girlfriend (…LIFE…) completely because every day she comes to me with new color and shade but I am not finished with writing about her. In next post, I will reveal some more secrets about our relation…till than live the life…and feel the love…